Where did she go?

For the past few months it’s been sad, painful., with a bit of happiness mixed in with it. There used to be this girl who was happy all-around, was used to exchanging jokes with people and such. But lately, she’s been consumes with gloominess. And who can blame her? Little by little the things she likes disappears on her. Taken by others or just going away. Now she’s consumed by sadness and pain. The people she turns to, instead of comforting her makes her feel more lost and worthless than she already feels. There are happy times in everyday, but recently they get overshadowed by the sadness. A few days from now, I was happy cuz I recovered someone. Just to be disappointed to find that he’s gone again. I’m slowly spinning into a destructive cycle I don’t want to be in. In school, things are fine, but when I get home.. the feelings I hide away hit me all at the same time. It’s all too easy to just give in and cry. How can you deal with something when the person who made you happy is the cause of your anguish now? And not only does he seem not to care about it, it’s like he taunts you with it, also comparing you to other girls?

I guess when you’ve been broken down so many times, it’s hard to see the positive in things. I miss that happy girl. Seems like ages ago when she sat here where I sit. I wonder when I’ll see her again.

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