Alejandro Alcala

First off, you’ve been such a help this year. Even though I’ve only known you for less than a year, you’ve already made a big impact on my life. I know, as much as everyone knows, that you can be annoying, hard-headed, depressing, pig-headed, a jerk, a lazy bum, a heartless dictator – and so on and so forth. But really, you’re more than I could ask for.

I know you’ve been through a lot of things this year and the years before that, but you’ve come a long way from what you were before. You are actually kind of a softie sometimes, but you always try to put up a tough front so as people won’t see that your hurt. Sometimes this trait of yours seems wonderful and cool, but to see you like that.. kind of sad sometimes, seeing you struggle all on your own, not letting others try to help you.

Aj, you’ve been such a blessing to me. There are times when I’m a bit too demanding and annoying, but you always put up with me and my rants. You’re always there to listen to my problems. You’re always warm and understanding. You’ve always been a shoulder to cry on – and mostly cry about >.> man, you’ve made me cry quite a lot – but despite all that, you’ve always been the reason for most of my smiles.

I know we have different tastes in things most of the time,. Like in music, cartoons and movies. I’m sorry when I bore you with trivial little things., then you go making me feel like it’s okay.. sometimes I just feel so lucky to have you. Every time I feel like that.., I’m at a loss for words, so I just tell you “you’re adorable” really, that’s what I say when I just find you too amazing and cuddly and loveable. Every time you mention the things you’d do for me, all the things you’d try to accomplish, even saying that you’ll be okay with moving here.. all those things make me feel so loved, and they make me fall for you a little more.

You’ve been always helpful to me. I guess, as you said, this time you’re really pouring out what you can in this relationship. Believe me, I want to do that too, and I will. So yeah., there’s also my jealousy issues.. I’m sorry, I just couldn’t help it.. It’s just until now I think I couldn’t really accept that you, someone who’s wanted by almost all single – and sometimes not – girls that you talk to, is mine. I mean, if there was any way to trim your “adorable, warm and caring, cool guy” thingy a bit, I might have done it already. But no.. I actually give you your ‘loose leash’ cause I trust you enough to know what you’re doing. I’m sorry I’m not the best girl a guy could have, or even the cutest / prettiest. I just want you to know that I appreciate you so much.

Oh, and don’t worry about Glenn anymore. I promise I don’t feel anything for him anymore, well aside from the occasional grrr.. but yeah,. Also, sometimes, can you be a little more… not cold? I know you’re not the warmest person on earth, but when you have problems, can you talk about them with me? It’s just that, you always seem to just turn into the Thinker when you have something on your mind.

Aj, I’m sorry when I’m sappy. I’m sorry when I’m cold and angry. I’m sorry for all the times I’ve made you mad, even though you won’t admit it. I just want you to know that I’m thankful you decided to talk to that stranger on Exiled, and you made her feel welcome. Thank you for everything. I dove you so much. I do hope everything works out.

I do have so much more I feel like I want to say, but words fail me. I used to believe I am a weaver of words, but with you, now, I am but a simple human. I dove you AJ, much more than words can say, much more than my brain can think of, and much more than I could express. Thanks for everything.

So hah! 712 words (<—not including that of course)


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